everything is turned in. papers have been swished along. recommendations read and scrutinized. resumes reviews. personal statements hated or loved. GRE scores again telling people how smart or stupid I am. control is gone. no longer mine. but now in the hands of professors. in the hands of “selection committees.” and having been a graduate student before and on the selection committee I do not feel comfortable with selection committees. Selections made haphazardly. Future in the hands of other people. am i good enough. was i ever good enough. will i ever be good enough. we will find out in the next month.
for now, i must rest in the knowledge that i did what all i could.
